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Coldplay and Coronation Street Unite for The Parents

Who are the best people in your corner when you want parental leave for the self employed? Pop singers and soap stars of course. Who else?

Nobody, and that is why Chris Martin of the famous band “Coldplay” and Tracy Brabin of former “Coronation Street” fame, have decided to lend their support to the issue of getting paid to look after your kids…while you are self employed.

More specifically, this is about self employed fathers getting a wedge of cash from the government to share the parental responsibilities once the baby comes along.

Do you know who else would be the perfect spokesperson for a cause such as this? Jeremy Kyle, the talk show host who specialises in finding out “Just who’s baby is it, and who is the Dad?” Once Jeremy identifies the male, then it would be a simple process to put that “Dad” on the payroll.

“Do you even want to become self employed?” Jeremy would shout. Followed by…”Here. Just take your parental leave money and get out of the building.”

It’s only when stars such as Chris Martin, Tracy Brabin and Jeremy Kyle put their name behind something, well, that is when the wheels start moving and something can be done.

As we speak, it is only employed Mothers and Fathers who can share the responsibility of parenting with a stack of cash in their bank account from the government. Self employed Mothers do get a stack…but fathers? No stack.

According to the maternity discrimination action group called “Pregnant Then Screwed,” getting shared parental leave for the self employed would be a major step forward in gender equality.

They went on to say that in the creative industries this would have a major impact, mainly due to the fact that 44% of people in those industries are self employed.

I wonder if the Creative Industries Federation (CIF) are in agreement with “Pregnant Then Screwed” on this one? If so, then I’m sure they will soon be working together in order to eradicate this once and for all.

When you consider that so many creative people are self employed, then it’s easy to understand why Chris Martin, Tracy Brabin and Jeremy Kyle have got right behind this campaign.

“Just take the paternity test,” Jeremy Kyle will no doubt be saying, followed by, “what are you…SCARED?”

Right now in order for a self employed woman to be eligible for maternity leave, she must have been self employed for 26 weeks or more.

Through the Freedom of Information Act…what we have found is that around 24,000 women in self employment take the government up on their offer and get the Maternity Allowance.

Olga FitzRoy, who is involved with a group called “Parental Pay Equality” said recently, “This is a great opportunity for politicians of all parties to unite behind the bill, which will send a strong message that men and women are valued equally in the home and in the workplace.”

I just hope that Olga and CIF join forces at some point in the future, to brainstorm potential ways they can wipe clean the slate and see a clearer future.

Or just leave everything in the hands of a certain Mr Jeremy Kyle…”Self employed are you? You deserve every penny of that parental leave…and I haven’t even started yet…so why don’t you sit down, shut up, and just take the test, you BIG HARD MAN.”

“The DNA tests show that…You ARE the father. Now get home and start claiming that parental pay!”

[The crowd goes wild with appreciation and Jeremy has a look of victory on his face]

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